Squirrels – Nut Hunters or Just Nuts?

Diving into the deep history and mythology of nuts and the squirrels who hunt them, today we ask the tough question: are they prime hunters or just nuts?

They have long since been the butt of many jokes, but do we really need to take such a harsh light to the majestic squirrels? They fritter about all around us. Look, there’s one now. Fritter fritter, young squirrel, fritter freely.

Researchers have recently found that various genus of squirrels are well capable of hunting down different kinds of nuts. For instance, the fox squirrel is well known for being able to track down hazelnuts better than any other. And let us not forget the Norwegian Brand Squirrel’s uncanny ability to track down Cyprus Red Tails. I don’t think we need any reminding of the 2010 Red Nut incident.

These nigh-infallible beings have run rampant across our grand lands for many a year, but how exactly have they been able to search for nuts? Science tells us it’s because of stuff. But what is stuff? Is it our innate ability to understand the deeper connections between survival and the beings that surmount this world in an unending and unquestionable balance of life and death? Or is it something deeper? Do we all have the stuff? In this reporter’s opinion, I dunno.

Squirrels is a Tokusatsu Nutwork original feature article about squirrels and stuff. You can copy it if you want, we don’t really care.